Synchronicity

Do you believe in synchronicity?

I do.

And I believe what we do with our past pain and suffering matters.

Resilience is the ability to get back up when we’re down. Some of us got up alone using the ambers of our pain to fuel our fires. Others had amazing mentors help them see glimmers of hope.

As educators, we can show up for misunderstood children.

Thursday is a day I’ll never forget.

We were facilitating activities amongst 10 – 12-year-old children.

The purpose was to talk about big emotions and self-regulation.

Sometimes these conversations are triggering for children.

And one boy struggled. Throughout the session, he was swearing at us, taking away materials and insulting his peers.

I saw the hurt in his eyes. I understood his pain. And did the best I could to de-escalate the situation while continuing our agenda.

After our session, I saw a man pacing in the hallway.

Moments later, he stood in front of me while gripping the back of son’s neck. He wanted to know if his son “disrupted” our session.

Unbeknownst to me, the director called the father to pick him up.  

I will never forget this boy’s eye contact. His body postures. His desperate plea for help all while not saying a word.

I spoke calmly to his father. I assured him that these things happen. I focused on all the good micro moments of his son.

I did this because I feared what would follow next.

I spent a while collaborating with the daycare’s director to map out a plan to help this boy. And I’m not going to lie, it’s going to be hard.

Because he’s living through a lot of pain and suffering. And his challenging behaviours reflect his hurt.

So, he needs a strong, caring, and dedicated person in his corner who believes in him. Someone he can lean on.

Back to the synchronicity part.

Yesterday something pulled me into an art shop. Something I haven’t done in a decade.

A portrait caught my eye. The owner and photographer shared the backstory of the picture.

As we continued our conversation, he told me he struggled a lot during his youth. He was a misunderstood child. He said he was lucky to still be alive.

And his message was simple yet profound.

He believed we need love, connection and someone who wants us to succeed to propel us forward.

I couldn’t agree more.

I know firsthand how difficult children’s challenging or disrupted behaviours can be.

Sometimes their behaviours bring up unpleasant moments of our past. And naturally our instinct is to shut them down.

But when we lean in, we become curious.

And we get to show up as the person we wished our inner child had.

With all my love,

Alex